Counseling is a very personal process where you are being asked to relate and express your thoughts and feelings to someone that you might have disclosed to others in only a limited way before or maybe not at all. For many people, this is more comfortably done in a more private individual setting than in a group or class/workshop type arrangement. There are circumstances that are just better suited for the individual approach.

You might be at a point in your life where you feel confused or stuck and looking for help to get back on track? You’re not alone! I work with persons who describe similar feelings and with some guidance, find relief and a better way. Perhaps you would describe your suffering as anxiety or depression, emotional pain coming from relationships or recent or past trauma, or perhaps suffering in the form of self-doubt, regrets and worries, or anger or fear. Stress might seem overwhelming, even in choosing someone to talk to. I would like to help.

My 30+ years of counseling and mental health experience have shown me that counseling is helpful in addressing troubling aspects of one’s life enabling movement towards greater happiness and harmony. It can provide you the opportunity to safely express yourself, and clarify and resolve personal, vocational, and relationship issues of concern to you or that seem to be holding you back.

I understand the importance to work with someone you can connect and feel comfortable with, who you can trust, and who cares about helping you and your progress. I do my best to provide a safe, empathic, nonjudgmental, and confidential environment to meet in. I would work in a collaborative role with you and offer support and guidance based upon the goals and treatment plan we agree on, as we find more effective ways to deal with things.

For those unfamiliar with the process, we begin in the first session by you describing what concerns you the most at the present time and me asking questions to understand them. I’ll explore with you what possible signs and symptoms you may have and inquire about some of your treatment, if you’ve had some, and personal history. We’ll want to have some understanding, as best we can, of what you’d like to achieve in counseling or therapy, appreciating that your goals and issues may change over time and with changing life circumstances. I generally want to get to know you a little, and of course, we’ll see how counseling treatment might help. You’ll also have a chance to ask me questions. At the end of the first session or two, we’ll have an opportunity to discuss whether my approach and working with me seems like a good fit for you.

The ongoing process of counseling involves, in general, discussing aspects about the issues that are important to you, which you take the lead in identifying. At times I’ll ask questions about these, about what’s going on inside on a body level, what you think and feel, as well as make comments and suggestions. Different approaches for different circumstances and problems may be used. 

These might involve problem-solving, identifying triggers of distress, learning techniques or tools to better manage emotions and symptoms you have, challenging the veracity of some negative thought patterns or beliefs and perhaps reframing them. There are times, for instance, when what is most relevant and helpful is identifying what the nature of your thoughts and beliefs are that influence your choices and actions; the ones that seem so true, but when brought to light turn out to be judgments and assumptions that can be worked with. Examples might be inner states or messages like, “There’s something wrong with me,” “I’m just too nervous and scared, so I won’t try,” or “If only it was this way,” or “What if that happens?” or “Nothing ever works out for me,” “No one really cares.”

There may be times when exploring and understanding the underlying factors, possibly historical, that influence your present troubling experience is most helpful. This process may include re-experiencing painful feelings related to the present and/or the past in an effort to process, clarify, let go, and open to new possibilities of building inner strength, and living more fully and freely.

The concept and practice of mindfulness is also a relevant component in my approach to counseling. Building greater awareness of present experience can be learned through various techniques, including meditation if you’re open to it, to help discern different perspectives, foster calmness,  and cultivate greater acceptance and even self-compassion. 

A beneficial practice for just about everyone is practicing acceptance. So many of us believe that there is something wrong with us, or what we think or how we feel, that needs changing in order to be acceptable or worthy. It’s kind of like shaking our finger at ourselves in an accusatory or cautionary manner thinking it will help. An alternative not usually considered is changing our relationship to them. Instead of judging or criticizing ourselves, we bring attention to our thoughts and feelings in a less personal and nonjudgmental way. We can learn to become more mindful with acceptance of our experience of distress, rather than it reflecting who we are. We might say to ourselves, “This is a part of me, but it is not all of me.” This might be an important aspect of reconnecting to your real self. Being more accepting and mindful of your present experience can help open the door for self-compassion, insight, change, relaxation, and healing to come in. Change and growth are possible!

Thank you for taking the time to read this. If these ideas fit into what you are looking for, then give me a call or email me to arrange an appointment.